Like a fish in water... 3/14/2010

If there is anything that I've learned throughout all my life it's that perception can make or brake this life. Our consciousness organizes and categorizes on levels we are not even capable of perceiving consciously, but if we focus on how we interpret things we can allow ourselves to become free.

During one of my escapes from reality, the walls of my house had another layer just about a centimeter away from the physical wall.
This layer was like a wall of its own, but was an interconnected web of geometric shapes.
While inspecting the room I noticed that this pattern continued onto the floor covering the carpet and most other large surfaces. During the times I stopped my mind from its own wanderings, and looked upon this veil or covering, its shape would change from something pleasant to something which made my insides churn...

The shapes morphed into strange insect-like faces which filled me with fear. I found myself on my knees and I could see these horrific face-shapes on my floor squirm into my body. I watched as my veins and skin bumped in tandem with the little devils- from where it touched the floor up my arm until I could take no more.

Losing myself again in a psychedelic-fractal-thought-form.

When I came back to what could arguably be called reality, I noticed that the shapes upon the wall were back to their original shape, and happily bouncing.

This time I looked at the patterns with wonder and appreciation, understanding that it was a part of me, as much as I was a part of it. The shapes then lulled, the space in-between the lines of the shapes grew. I felt a wave of euphoria sweep across my body. The shapes then took a face-form again but this time one of a jovial nature...

For at least 6 hours this process repeated, switching each time from positive to negative. Immersed completely in the depth of each feeling. I was that feeling. Each feeling was me.

During this time. though I was submerged in illusion and believed these images to be higher beings with a consciousness of their own- I wasn't far off, but not quite on either.

For they were merely the visual projections of the mind. They are active all the time, they were visual manifestations of the algorithms of the visual processing systems. Emotion, cognition, and perception are not nearly, so neatly separated as your school books would lead you to believe...

When your brain is super-pumped, your best tool becomes your master. You cannot control the places it goes, it controls you.

THIS IS LIBERATION. liberation from the things we are taught to believe. Liberation from the false beliefs which barrage us all from birth...Liberation from the machinations and confines of your own mind.

Everyday, people do it.
They create the same scenarios,
different faces, but the same outcome,
never really thinking much of it.
The answers are always right there,
SCREAMING for your attention,
but you just speed by,
your mind just too damn preoccupied
with the comfortable thoughts its always habitually think-feel-perceiving.

I write this part as therapy for my regaining clarity, part for those who may find themselves thrown out into the great sea, but also just to share a bit of the treasures I was able to return with

Those morphing geometric face-shapes directly mirror the minds ability to morph reality. I'm not talking about psychedelic reality- I'm talking about the 9 -5 grind, the mundane, disinterested, the sober, pragmatic mind. The people and places you go, the food you eat, the place you live. Everything you need is already inside of you, its just a matter of taking responsibility, relaxing the body, the emotions, and the mind. Do not strive to live life like you are some righteous omnipotent being...

Are your brave enough and strong enough to live open, perceptive, responsive, and free from habitual programming?

This life is here for us to all enjoy it! LOVE IT! let go of your dogmatic views and do what it is you were born to do..