Negrado

 How is it that life continually finds new ways to decimate me, without actually putting me out of my misery?

Since 2018 I have been obstructed, destroyed, annihilated, bound, humiliated, and continually thrown upside down...

I have tried in vain to change everything.
Yet I still remain.

Only after making positive changes am I rewarded with more sickness and setbacks.
The goals and objectives our collective selves have defined as important- as worth orienting around
and toward,
they do nothing for me.
All comes with a cost I am unwilling, or perhaps, unable to pay.

Suffering comes no matter what your works, no matter the integrity of your heart.
We must face them, they are gifts wrapped in pain and great sorrow,
yet if we can steady ourselves,
inside there is gold.
Inside there is gold.

Keep going.